Some teasing: (Updated)

A man went to the doctor and said - "Doctor, whenever I fart there's no smell". The doctor asked he man if he could do one there and then, which the man did, very loudly. The doctor sniffed a few times, said - "Yes, I think I know what the problem is", went out of the surgery for a moment and came back with a very long stick with a hook on the end. The man became very frightened and asked - "Doctor, what are you going to do with that thing?", to which the doctor replied - "I'm going to open the window - you've got something wrong with your nose!".

Q: If I squash a red bean and a green bean, what kind of bean will I get? A: Soya bean, cos "shou ya" (use hand to compress) bean.

Q: A bird was flying half-way from Russia to USA when there is a thunderstorm. The bird was not striked but still die. Why? A: Cos it used one of its wings and pat on its chest and said "heng ah, bo tio lightning", and fell to its death. .

Q: 2 birds sitting on a tree branch, a goat was eating grass below the tree. A hunter came by, saw the goat and shot it. The female bird said something to the male bird and get raped. What did the female bird told the male bird? A:"xia mian yang si le" (in chinese means "below" v.itchy)

Two families move from Afghanistan to America. When they arrive, the fathers make each other a bet: In a year's time, whichever family has become more American will win. A year later when they meet again, the first guy says, “Today I had a McDonalds breakfast, bought a case of Budweiser, and I'm about to pick my son up from football practice in my brand-new SUV. How about you?” The second guy says, “Fuck off, terrorist.”

Which building in orchard is the most cleanest and tidy?
ans: Lucky plaza. Why? becoz Filipino and Indonesians maids always hang there so they will clean up due to their "career ill-ness"

Glass cup and Coffee cup cross the road at the same time, but when someone shouted "Look out, got car coming!" In the next moment, glass cup kenna bang by car and coffee cup manage to escape the accident. Why coffee cup nvr end up kenna bang by car?
ans: Becoz coffee cup got ears "the handle"

Three guys: a Canadian, Osama bin Laden, and Uncle Sam are out walking together one day. They come across a lantern and a genie pops out of it."I will give each of you each one wish. That's three wishes total," says the genie. The Canadian says, "I'm a farmer, my dad was a farmer, and my son will also farm. I want the land to be forever fertile in Canada." With a blink of the genie's eye, *POOF* the land in Canada was forever made fertile for farming. Bin Laden was amazed, so he said, "I want a wall around Afghanistan, so that no infidels, Jews, or Americans can come into our precious state."Again, with a blink of the genie's eye, *POOF* there was a huge wall around Afghanistan. "Uncle Sam" (A former civil engineer), asks, "I'm very curious. Please tell me more about this wall." The Genie explains, "Well, it's about 15,000 feet high, 500 feet thick, and completely surrounds the country; nothing can get in or out - it's virtually impenetrable." Uncle Sam says, "Fill it with water."